Monday, November 02, 2009
it's interesting how the enviornment change you...3 good years ago...it seems so unstoppable, seems so reckless.. soo thrilling..i still remember those times when i really really wasn't using much of my brain...and i was glad that i never need to use much?? things were more spontaneous, and without thinking, i always made the best choice ever.
Now, everything changes..
i have to basically use my brain to think, to ponder, to calculate..so many shit hole things for god knows how many times a day? academics is one thing..daily important decisions is another. ( Did i screw up? Was that THE best thing to do? What should i do next? ) and when i was tired and TRIED the method of doing things on impulse and recklessness...confirm screw up big big time...
if i can recall...the last time i did something on impulse..totally screwed me..well not really..but still lol.
see this is what happens when you can't really find your own identity?
i think i lost mine...the worst part...when people ask me who i am....
jordan never came up to mine...
nope it's not just a name...it's not just some alter ego either..
It should be something that represents me...
somehow...it just never did..
teenagers..we should use our POWER OF YOUTH and FIERY SPIRITS and dash forward or something...
and here i am finding out who i am...
that is darn stupid....
this holidays is mundane already.
when any case..after a long hiatus...i actually exercise today.
jogging...i reached my target..around the neighborhood one round...
it really is a long distance...sure more than 2.4..
but after that i almost died.lol
but i guess it's a good thing..two birds in one stone.
the pull up dream sure did motivate me...
i dreamt that i could do 4 pull ups. When i can do none.
well haha..long way to go dude...
i think i would need ukimono..
haha..what does it really mean by all i've got.
interesting concept...
plan.
posted by jordan chung at Monday, November 02, 2009 -